Reclaiming “Difficult”

Written By: Makesi Boodram ~ @kcsarwan

Why must she be difficult to deal with? Why is it that, if she knows her mind, and what she wants, why is this always labelled as something that needs adjusting?

Men and women cast their aspersions, on how women should be, what they should do and what their responses should be. Women like every other human, live their own individual realities and this affects their life and their actions. Of course there are women out there with emotional scars and baggage that they need to sort out themselves or at least with a supportive partner by their side. To the everyday woman with problems and trials in life, the run of the mill bad day however, why must she be “difficult” if she didn’t answer you favourably.

Quite a number of males fail to realise that, men are no easy sunset walks in the park. Sometimes what may be perceived by society as a man living a simple life, is sometimes the most stressful part of the relationship for his woman to deal with. Women are human beings too. Yes sometimes they perform miracles like child birth, or being a working mom and wife or finding that thing she sent you for in the spot she sent you too look in - Like how do they do that ? They are however, human beings.

Difficult women are made, not born and that’s a truth the world is going to have to come to terms with. Her life became complicated along the way, maybe it was with you maybe it wasn’t, but it isn’t your job to fix her, this woman is definitely not broken.  

Too many women I’ve seen suppress this inner Demi Goddess, woman you were born to shine, don’t step back in the name of stroking a boy’s ego. Stand up and claim your otherness, reclaim the word difficult, because you are worth the fight.

No relationship is constantly at peace and your difficult nature keeps the relationship fresh, with that hint of mystery you bring. You know what you want and you know just how you’d like it, if there is an issue, have a conversation with your man. Talk it over let your views be understood and heard. At no time however, make the word ‘difficult’ take away from your shine, far too many words have been used in history to coral women, this world does not need another.

So next time a man wants to say you’re difficult, you let him know.You are beautiful, you are strong, you are powerful, in every inch, scar and mark your body can muster. Don’t ever apologise for being unapologetically you, and if difficult is the only adjective his mind can muster, he just isn’t ready for your Queendom.