August 14th, 2017
When I was younger, I wasn't always allowed to listen to the radio. In fact, I was told that once I had my own car, I'd be able to listen to whatever I wanted. This in itself made me want to control the music I listened to everywhere I went. I carried my own CD player around, made requests on the radio and more than often was an AUX cord hog.
My friends became used to me controlling the music. I didn't think twice about it, for I was convinced I had the best taste in music and there was no room for argument. It wasn't until I got in a car with someone who was more of an AUX hog than myself, that I realized I was looking at my own reflection.
It was like this entire time I had to prove how good my taste in music was. In a way, I wanted to prove this to my friends, but in reality, I wanted to prove it to myself.
We often feel the need to control the little things in order to live our most comfortable lives. But sometimes, our need for control takes over our need for experience and togetherness. Our obsessive habit of control can lead us to become egocentric, creating a false identity of who we think we are, and the belief of doing and saying things in order to hold a certain status or reputation. In reality, this only takes us further away from who we are truly meant to be.
When you begin to think about your controlling habits, pause for a second. Do something that scares you, or that you don't normally like to do. For example, if you are used to driving yourself everywhere, let someone else take the wheel for a change. Or perhaps you feel like you can't trust your younger sibling to borrow clothing from you-- give your heart and take that risk.
These little changes will break down your control barriers, and allow you to give light to relationships that have been unknowingly lingering in the dark. For we must see the reflection of ourselves in one another to see through our self-built barriers.