Since I was a little girl, we always had a complicated relationship.
For a long time, it seemed like you weren’t a part of me. I glanced at you and I didn’t feel like you were mine.
I didn’t nourish you; I didn’t look at you, I refused to accept you.
I thought it was all your fault. The way people treated me; the way people looked at me.
I was ashamed and I blamed you.
But it never really had anything to do with you and it had everything to do with the constructed beauty norms that are forced upon women. It took a long time for me to understand that.
I’m sorry I put you through so much pain.
You’ve never failed me. No matter how many days I let you starve, no matter how much anxiety I put you through, no matter how much I hated you, you never let me down.
The day I realized that I needed to make peace with you, my whole life changed.
I love you because thanks to you, I can run through the grass and feel the sun on my skin. I can dance and let the music transport me. I can laugh until I cry and my stomach hurts. Thanks to you, I can feel my heart beat with every breath I take.
It doesn’t matter what other people think of you. You are unique and beautiful with your unusual curves, with every stretch mark, with every freckle.
You are my home.
Laura Désirée Mouroux