often hear people speak about blow jobs as if it’s a mandatory chore... an obligation they must fulfill.
Well I’m going to stop you right there to remind you of something.
You do not have to do anything that you are uncomfortable with. That goes for anything, but especially sexual acts that you do not want to partake in.
Be sure to communicate with your partner and express your sexual boundaries; be clear on what you are and are not willing to experiment with. Your partner is expected to respect these limitations.
If you don’t like giving blow jobs, that’s cool! I’m not here to try and convince you otherwise.
I am here to share some tips for those who willingly choose to perform bj’s, for those looking to improve or perfect the art, and for those who may even enjoy doing it, like me.
These tips have been tested personally by yours truly, and have a pretty perfect track record for making men, or people with a penis (because not all people with a penis identify as male), feel fucking amazing.
Tips for Sucking D
Giving a blow job is an experience - Whether it’s a positive one or negative one depends largely on the person's attitude who is giving the blow job.
If you go into it thinking, “this is the worst thing ever. I hate doing this”, or, “I suck at this and would rather be eating a pizza”, your experience will likely be unenjoyable.
Mindset is huge.
If you go into it thinking, “I really want to make my partner feel amazing, and love that their pleasure is in my hands (or mouth, lol)”, you’re likely going to enjoy the process much more.
Here are some tips for becoming a bj master!
1. Get into a comfortable position - make sure your neck isn’t straining too hard, and that you can use your hands easily. Pick a position that you can stay in for a while. *Tip: Sitting on the corner of the bed while your partner stands in front of you, or putting a pillow under your knees while your partner sits on a couch, are two positions that I find quite comfortable and effective.
2. Be enthusiastic - no one wants someone sucking their dick while they look miserable, angry, bored, or disinterested. Make noises and dirty talk - say things that let your partner know you are loving every second of it. Ex: Mmm babe, I love the way your beautiful cock tastes.
3. Check in with your partner - while your doing your thang, ask if your partner enjoys what you’re doing. I often say, “Tell me how you like it baby.” Or, “Is this good for you?” If I’m doing it, I want to do it right. Everyone likes different things, so open communication is key to giving an amazing blow job.
4. Start with the tip - gently kiss, lick, and suck the tip. Swirl your tongue around, and maybe even give it a very gentle nibble now and then.
5. Don’t forget the shaft - start to slowly lick down the shaft of the penis and back up. I like to swirl my tongue around the shaft in unpredictable motions, so they don’t know what to expect. Every now and then come back up to the tip and give it some TLC.
6. Taking it all - now that you’ve gotten the shaft nice and wet, put your entire mouth around the penis and try and go down as far as you can (without barfing, lol. But seriously). Slide your mouth up and down slowly, still remembering to swirl your tongue now and then. I have found that men absolutely love it when you make a gagging sound when your trying to take all of them in your mouth.
7. Make eye contact - while you’re sliding your mouth up and down his dick, make sure to lock eyes with your partner. Eye context makes the experience more intimate, and sexy.
8. Find his erroneous zones and stimulate those while sucking his dick. Some erroneous zones include the:
* Scrotum - the sac that holds the testicles. It can be very sensitive.
* Perineum - this is the spot between your asshole and scrotum. It is full of nerves and is very sensitive to stimulation.
* Prostate - the prostate is located a few inches inside of the anus and is often referred to as the ‘male G-spot.’ Try giving a prostate massage - there are tons of guides online.
9. Use your hands - try to simultaneously use your hands to slide up and down the shaft, while using your mouth as well. I like to firmly grip the shaft and twist my hand/wrist as I slide up and down. The twisting motion seems to be the cherry on top for many men. It drives them wild!
10. Smack their dick on your cheek and tongue - tell them how much you love their cock and how badly you want to make them bust.
Summing it Up
For those of you like me, who do not swallow, consider whether you are comfortable having your partner finish on a body part - perhaps your breasts, stomach, ass, back, or face.
Remember, sucking dick should ideally be enjoyable, for both the giver and receiver.
Don’t feel pressured to do anything that you are not comfortable with, or that you do not want to do.
You don’t owe anyone, anything. Period, end of sentence.
What are some of your favourite moves while giving a blow job? I’m always looking for new tips. - Reach out to @talking.with.talya ❤️
Thanks so much for tuning in!
I’m hoping I’ve given you at least a couple new moves to add to your repertoire.
Until next time, babes!
- Tal, xox