Ghosting in Dating:
Why People Vanish Without a Word
And Then He Vanished: My Ghosting Experience
And then he vanished. Without saying a word. As if the past two months meant nothing. As if his whispered promises were meaningless. Welcome to the world of ghosting… it fucking sucks!
What Is Ghosting?
For those unfamiliar, ghosting is the act of abruptly cutting someone out of your life—romantically or platonically—without explanation. It’s disrespectful, hurtful, and can be emotionally damaging, especially for those with preexisting self-esteem challenges.
Why Ghosting Is So Common Today
Apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble make ghosting all too easy. Delete the match, and communication stops. No confrontation, no emotional discomfort for the ghoster. When the connection isn’t strong, the social consequences seem minimal.
But here’s the truth: ghosting is pathetic behavior, plain and simple.
Why Ghosting Bothers Me
Ghosting frustrates me for two reasons:
- Avoiding honesty is cowardly. Am I really that intimidating that someone fears my reaction?
- Assuming I can’t handle the truth is insulting. Rejection is a normal part of life—and yes, dating is full of it.
I’ve survived rejection. So can you.
The Excuses Ghosters Give
Sometimes, ghosters offer reasons like:
- “I started seeing someone else.”
- “My feelings got too strong.”
Translation: they didn’t want to be honest. Excuses are weak attempts to save face. The truth is simple: a clear, respectful rejection is better than vanishing.
Respectful Ways to Reject Someone
Next time you feel like ghosting, try honesty instead. Some examples:
- “Hey, I’ve enjoyed spending time together, but I don’t feel the romantic connection I’m looking for. I hope you understand. I’d love to stay friends if you’re interested.”
- “I think you’re great and have enjoyed getting to know you, but I don’t feel the emotional connection I’m hoping for. I wish you the best.”
The key: be authentic, gentle, and respectful.
Dating Is Hard — Don’t Make It Harder
Every person deserves honesty and respect. Ghosting might seem easier, but in reality, it’s cowardly and hurtful. Challenge yourself to be upfront—the results may surprise you.
Author: Talya, xox